A year ago I began digging a hole. I didn't realize what I was doing until I had lost sight of daylight. At that point the hole was so fuckin deep it was hell crawling out. But I managed to, I just have the final step left now. It feels kind of sad leaving the hole, though, because I learned a lot while wandering around in the shadows...
The most important thing is that I can't do everything. I've managed doing lots of things, but while doing shitloads of different things you end up not really doing anything at all in the end. You need focus. But it's tough, because it means you have to prioritize, which means you have to say no to some things. I hate that, I want it all. And I want it now! (Nice tune, that one...)
So I don't climb anymore. I don't run after every single girl that happens to cross my path (or come close enough). I don't play the drums, nor guitar. I don't skate. I don't drink as much as I used to. I don't waste all my money as I used to. I don't work as much as I used to.
I have rediscovered my love of music. I have realized I actually love my friends - they are no longer a bunch of people known as "friends of mine" (or rather "people that miraculously puts up with me").
As I said, I still have that last step to take - I have to decide which life to choose. But I doubt I will make that decision until I meet Her, She who will walk with me until the end of the world.
Until then I will just enjoy life as it is. Because - life's goooood!
